Things not to say to your prospective boss at a job interview:

1. I want your job.
2. I never work in the afternoon - I'm too drunk.
3. Do you want to hear about my police record?
4. Who's that old hag in the photo on your desk?
5. Have you just farted?
6. Where the hell did you get that tie?
7. I bet you have a crush on your secretary.
8. The voices in my head told me to come for this interview.
9. Now, that's a stupid question to ask....